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!alias !savealias !leetappend %~/files/useraliases 10 !alias %%s
!alias !reload !raw quit :reload
!alias !addlink !leetappend /var/www/sites/hacking/links.txt 10 %%s (~%%n)
!alias !drop !say %%n: Dropping shell right now, type exit when done.
!alias !dig !c dig %%s
!alias !more !tailunlock %~/files/cmd_out
!alias !ping !say pong
!alias !ec !eval %~/scripts/evalcommand %%s
!alias !lambda !ec echo -ne 'SegFault: alias !tmp %%s\n!tmp\n'
!alias !pymath !c python -c 'import math;print(%%s)'
!alias !reset !kill 9 -1
!alias !up !c uptime
!alias !randip !c perl -le '$,=".";print map int rand 256,1..4;' %%s
!alias !jarg !c cat /service/gitd/jargon/jarg.txt | XuntilY "^:%%s" "^:." | tail -r | tail -n+2 | tail -r
!alias !jargcheck !c cat /service/gitd/jargon/jarg.txt | XuntilY "^:%%s" "^:." | tail -r | tail -n+2 | tail -r | wc -l
!alias !lambda !ec echo -ne '%%m: alias !tmp %%s\n!tmp\n'
!alias !topic !rc echo "TOPIC %%f :%%s (set by %%n at $(date -u "+%%%%b %%%%m %%%%R") UTC)"
!alias !pty !sh python -c 'import pty;pty.spawn("/usr/pkg/bin/bash")'
!alias !you !rc if [ "%%s" = "there" ] || [ "%%s" = "there?" ]; then printf "PRIVMSG %%f :\x01ACTION is totally here\x01\n"; else echo "PRIVMSG %%f :no, you %%s" | tr '?' '!'; fi
!alias !escape_sequences !c grep "//here" /root/services/segfault/segfault.c
!alias !irc !eval %~/scripts/ircrawcommand %%s
!alias !ic !eval %~/scripts/irccommand %%s
!alias !reeval !eval %~/files/useraliases

######### the todo shit #########
!alias !addtodo !leetappend /var/todo/%%n.txt 10 "%%s"
!alias !todo.add !addtodo %%s

!alias !todo !c cat -n /var/todo/%%n.txt | shuffle -f-| head -n1
!alias !todo. !todo %%s

!alias !diddo !c rmln %%s /var/todo/%%n.txt
!alias !todo.rm !diddo %%s
!alias !tododel !diddo %%s

!alias !todos !c cat -n /var/todo/%%n.txt
!alias !todo.list !todos

!alias !ntodo !c wc -l /var/todo/%%n.txt
!alias !todocount !ntodo
!alias !todo.length !ntodo

!alias !greptodo !c cat -n /var/todo/%%n.txt | grep -i "%s"
!alias !todogrep !greptodo %%s
!alias !todo.grep !greptodo %%s

!alias !todo.claim !c ln /var/todo/%%s.txt /var/todo/%%n.txt 
########## the end of that shit #########

!alias !tmplink !c echo '<meta http-equiv="refresh" content="0;url=%%s">' > /var/www/sites/hacking/tmplink.html
!alias !links !c if [ "%%s" ];then grep -i "%%s" /var/www/sites/hacking/links.txt;else echo http://$(rdns $(hop0 %%h))/cgi-bin/links.cgi;fi
!alias !rmuseralias !c rmln %%s %~/files/useraliases
!alias !useraliases !c cat -n %%~/files/useraliases %%s
!alias !duplicateuseraliases !c cut '-d ' -f2 %%~/files/useraliases | uniq -d
!alias !grepuseraliases !useraliases | grep %%s
!alias !tits !say [  . | .  ]
!alias !geo !c whob %%s | egrep "^Country:|^City"
!alias !dcc !rc p=$[45000 + ($RANDOM % 20000)];echo -e "privmsg %%n :\x01DCC SEND $(basename %%s) $(dcchelper $(gethostbyname %%h)) $p `wc -c "%%s"|tr -s ' '|cut '-d ' -f2`\x01";ncat -l -p $p < "%%s"
!alias !title !c wget --no-check-certificate -qO- "%%s" | tr '>' '\n' | XuntilY "<title" "</title"| sed 's/<.*$//'
!alias !suicide !kill 9 %%p
!alias !pingout !kill 17 %%p
!alias !built-ins !c grep strncmp /root/services/segfault/segfault.c | grep '"' | grep msg | tail -n+1 | cut '-d"' -f2 | tr '\n' ' ' | tr -s ' '
!alias !help !say try: !builtins and !aliases
!alias !cinit !leettail 56%%~/files/cmd_out
!alias !cat !leettail 28%%s
!alias !^C !c 
!alias !pid !say %%p
!alias !cloudflare !say cloudflare == cloudlog || cloudsniff || cloudinject
!alias !twit !c TTYtter -keyf=/home/segfault/.ttytterkey
!alias !fact _
!alias !fact-set _
!alias !fact-update _
!alias !fact _
!alias !fact-set _
!alias !fact-update _
!alias !help1 !say %%%%host %%h %%%%user %%u %%%%from %%f %%%%nick %%n
!alias !addtarget !leetappend /home/segfault/files/targets 10 %%s
!alias !seen !say .seen %s
!alias !modehelp !c grep "^  %s" /usr/local/src/ngircd-21.1/doc/Modes.txt
!alias !F !pymath (%s)*(9.0/5.0)+32
!alias !C !pymath (%s-32)*(5.0/9.0)
!alias !todo.link !say http://hacking.allowed.org/todo/%n.txt
!alias !howtome !c hop0 %h
!alias !twit !leetappend /home/segfault/files/twit_in 10 %%s
!alias !perl !c perl -e '%%s'
!alias !twit.follow !leetappend /home/segfault/files/twit_in 10 /follow %%s
!alias !hardreset !eval /home/segfault/scripts/hardreset
!alias !C2F !pymath %%s * 9 / 5 + 32
!alias !F2C !pymath (%%s - 32) * 5 / 9
!alias !unbantor !c /home/mkz/ban_tor nevermind
!alias !bantor !c /home/mkz/ban_tor I am sure
!alias !subseg !eval /home/segfault/scripts/subseg %%s
!alias !isup !c wget -q 'http://www.downforeveryoneorjustme.com/%s' -O- | grep "just you" | cut '-d<' -f1
!alias !todo.who !c ls -i /var/todo | sort | /home/epoch/list_todo
!alias !todo.gopher !c echo "gopher://$(rdns $(hop0 %h))/1/todo/%n.txt"
!alias !r !leetappend /service/segfault-link/a/files/log 10 %%s
!alias !untail !leetuntail %%f %%s
!alias !tpb !c tpb.sh %%s
!alias !randip !c whob $(dig -p 5353 whotoscan +short) | egrep "^IP:|^Country:"
!alias !ipgamescore !c cat /var/www/sites/hacking/iplog.txt |sort | uniq | grep -c ' user=%%s$'
!alias !quit !hardreset
!alias !stop !hardreset
!alias !wtf !c /usr/games/wtf %%s
!alias !stealnick !ec printf '!raw kill %%s :my nick\n!nick %%s\n'
!alias !killme !raw kill %%n :%%s
!alias !demorse !c echo '%%s' | /usr/games/morse -d
!alias !enmorse !c /usr/games/morse -s '%%s' | tr '\n' ' '
!alias !sayp !c lua /home/segfault/scripts/cowsay.lua %%s
!alias !fuckme !raw kick %%f %%n :fuck you
!alias !todo.n !todo.grep ^ *%%s`printf "\t"`
!alias !areacode !c grep '^%%s' /usr/local/share/misc/areacodes || echo nothing found
!alias !myip !c wget -qO- http://blackcatz.org/ip
!alias !tailpipe 24%%s
!alias !fuck !raw kill %%n :no. you can fuck %%s
!alias !op !raw kill %n :what are you? dumb? did you not see that +o I gave you when you joined!?!?
!alias !finger !c finger %%s
!alias !dig !dig +short %%s
!alias !dig !c dig +short %%s
!alias !link.add !addlink %%s
!alias !draw !c echo %%s | turn2line | lineplot | grep "[^ ]"
!alias !todo.get !c head -n %%s /var/todo/%%n.txt | tail -n1
!alias !polls !c head -n1 /var/polls/*/question
!alias !poll !c cat /var/polls/%%s/question
!alias !results !c cat /var/polls/%%s/votes | awk -F: '{print $2, $1}' | clump
!alias !vote !c /var/polls/vote %%n %%s